Welcome to a world of wedding ramblings.
Here you'll typically find an array of topics from fun, inspirational posts to a more thoughtful perspective on something topical.
There's no particular order or continuity to my blogging (sorry!) I just share my thoughts with you as and when they come to me. or I need to get something off my chest.
If there is anything in particular you'd like my take on then just let me know!
Whenever I sit to write a blog I always try and keep it both positive and honest. Those two things in the same capacity are becoming increasingly difficult I have to admit. As we enter Lockdown 2.0 I think the one thing the entire nation is united in is the slight numbness that comes with it; it’s safe to say we all hoped we’d be a little further forward by now, the weather is often as bleak as most people’s mood and, as always, the media is full of negativity, so I think we can forgive ourselves for feeling a little less than optimistic at the moment.
All of that said, there WILL be a day when hands cracking from being over santitised, holding your breath when someone walks passed a bit too close (be honest, we all do it) and a severe lack of hugging are all a dim and distant memory. Hopefully it comes sooner rather than later, but at some point that day will be here, and in the meantime all we can do is keep on looking forward.
With that in mind, this post is focused on my current outlook for the future, especially 2021 (of course I factually know no more than the next person, so this is purely based on my hope and genuine belief that there is light at the end of the tunnel eventually).
Photo Credit: The Fashion Wedding
I am getting an increasing number of messages from couples worried about their 2021 wedding; for some of you, your wedding date was always in 2021, for others, you’ve already been through the postponement ordeal once and are now worried you may be facing it all again (I fall into this second category myself). The current wedding ban isn’t helping the situation, but remember this IS temporary.
I understand the concerns, I really do. We’re in November (can you believe it?!) and so 2021 feels like it is just around the corner, I think it’s crept up on us all! Not much has changed in the past few months so it can be difficult to believe it will in the coming months. There are days when I feel that way too, BUT we must hold onto the positives…
1) We have learnt so much since all of this began. I know it doesn’t always feel like it, but we have come such a long way since this first knocked us off our feet. Not only is our wonderful NHS much better equipped – both in knowledge and the likes of PPE – but our businesses are also finding ways to work in a Covid-secure manner. When this first hit us, it came out of nowhere like a train, we weren’t ready. Whilst we still have a long way to go, we are learning how to carry on, safely, with this situation. Each day that passes is another day closer to normality.
2) Weddings took place in 2020. Despite all the carnage that’s been going on, weddings have still taken place this year. They’ve been smaller than planned in the majority of cases, and have had to be flexible, sometimes more than once. But they have happened. Not only have they happened but they’ve been just as beautiful as normal and in some aspects have even more meaningful than under normal circumstances. There is something very special about love fighting through and winning. Don’t get me wrong, it takes a lot of emotional strength to hang on with constantly changing rules and regulations, but if you can bear the ups and downs it will be SO worth it when you get there. If weddings took place in the height of all this chaos, I am confident they will be able to take place throughout 2021.
Photo Credit: The Fashion Wedding
3) Every top scientist in the world is working on testing/treatment/a vaccine. That has to mean something. Whilst none of those things will make Covid miraculously go away, they do hopefully mean a more normal way of life can resume…at least I like to think so. If we can implement regular, effective testing then that has to be a key to weddings and travel being able to take place as we are used to. All we need is that one breakthrough. If you’re getting married in 2021 then there is still hope this breakthrough could come before your wedding date, at the very least we’d like to think current measures will be more efficient.
4) The new normal isn’t a bad thing, just an adjustment in thinking. We’re used to weddings being a big celebration. In most cases they involve a large party with all of our wider family and friends. I’ve always planned elopements and small weddings (as well as larger events), even before all of this, so I’ve been lucky enough to witness a number of intimate weddings. I’ve also heard some really lovely stories relating to recent celebrations of just 15 or 30 guests. It can take a shift in perspective but there are some truly amazing plus points to having a small wedding…concentrate on what you could be gaining rather than what you feel you’re losing if you find yourself needing to reduce your guest list.
5) We’ll have a shift in priorities. As a bride-to-be myself, I can assure you that a benefit of all this is we’ll all be re-thinking our priorities. Things that seems so important before suddenly seem so irrelevant…I’ll give you an example. Previously a real issue for me was having our wedding venue in exclusive use – our guest list was a little short of the venue capacity meaning there was a chance some rooms could be sold to general public. The thought of this would send me into a right old tizz. Now I honestly couldn’t care less, yes exclusive use would be preferable but you know what, it won’t change our day if not. I just want our wedding to be able to go ahead in whichever way it can. In my opinion this way of thinking will be with us throughout 2021 (hopefully longer).
What about weddings after Covid-19?
Yes, that will be a thing I promise! The current situation won’t be with us forever, not in this way at least. I really believe there will be a day when we can have ‘normal’ weddings again, in whichever destination we choose with as many people as we want to have there.
However I do also believe that this whole saga is making small weddings more ‘socially acceptable’. For some couples, their absolute dream would be to have a micro-wedding but society can make it difficult. Pressure to invite Auntie Marge so you don’t cause offence, even though you’ve not seen her in years, will hopefully be a thing of the past.
I think couples will focus more on what they want, and not what they feel they should do. I also like to think we’ll all be more appreciative of the time with our loved ones; the general experience that couples have with their guests will be what’s most important.
Photo credit: Brandy Jackson
I can’t handle the worry and want to postpone already, what should I do?
At this stage I would urge you to hold out a little longer if you can, I still have very high hopes for 2021, but I know that waiting to see how things pan out isn’t an option for every couple. Some of you will be wanting to change your plans already, in which case there are some things you can do to help make the process less stressful for yourselves…
1) First things first, speak to your planner (or venue if you don’t have a planner).We are constantly keeping up-to-date with the current rules and regulations and are generally in-the-know with how the industry is managing the ongoing situation, please speak with us and trust us to advise you in the best way possible. We want your wedding to go ahead as much as you do.
2) You should be aware that venues and suppliers are now more prepared and may handle things differently for 2021 weddings than they did for 2020; this year we were caught off guard right at the point wedding season was getting underway – it was a case of act now think afterwards. By now everyone is more in the swing of things and most businesses have implemented Covid-19 policies. This means they may not be obliged to postpone your wedding without a fee as, at this stage, there is nothing to say that weddings cannot go ahead as planned in 2021.
3) If you are seriously considering postponing already, then a temporary solution that may ease some of your concern, could be to put an option on an alternative 2022 wedding date. Whether a venue/supplier is prepared to do this may depend on your current wedding date, but having a backup plan can help to calm some of the wedding nerves.
4) The more flexible you can be, the better. This is a constantly evolving situation. Most businesses in the wedding industry are small and often a one-man band. We are trying our best to keep up with the ever changing rules and what it means for you and your day, before doing what we can to then reduce any negative impact. Please know we have your best interests at heart. The situation isn’t ideal for anybody, we’ll do what we can to help but may just require a little flexibility from you at times.
Photo credit: The Fashion Wedding
I want to start my wedding planning; am I mad to book my wedding now?
No, I certainly don’t think so! If you’re newly engaged and haven’t yet got plans underway then you may be questioning whether now is the right time to get the planning ball rolling. It’s scary, and uncertain in many ways but now is also the perfect time to have a positive, future event to look forward to.
The extension of furlough and working from home gives a lot of people more time – a luxury that we struggle to find in normal day to day life. Use this time wisely to start researching your wedding.
You also have the benefit of knowing what you’re getting into, something that many 2020 and 2021 couples didn’t have. This means we can be more prepared. For all my new 2022/2023 bookings I am making sure my couples know not just my Covid-19 policy, but also the policies of their venue and suppliers prior to confirming the booking. This means you can progress your plans confident with what your options are should this situation continue longer than we hope.
There are a few drawbacks, for example new wedding insurance policies are currently on pause, and venue viewings are a little trickier, but there are always alternatives and options, so don’t rule out getting plans underway now because of everything that’s going on. If you’re keen to get started then speak with a planner, I’m more than happy to talk through the planning process in a Covid-19 world with potential couples, and I truly believe that for weddings in 2022 and 2023 we will be in a MUCH better place when your day finally comes around.
What about right now?
Right now, we can’t change what is happening around us. We just have to ride out the world’s longest rollercoaster. Allow yourself the occasional stress, tears and gloomy days if that’s how you feel, but also remember to remain positive whenever you can, know that you WILL get married and when you do, you’ll enjoy it all the more. If I can help alleviate your wedding worries in any way then please do reach out to me and I will do my best to put your mind at ease.
Photo credit: The Fashion Wedding
Brilliant post – I think this will be so helpful for so many brides 🙂 xx